I KNOW RIGHT
For those of you whose jaws are not on the floor right now let me give you a little history:
I am a guy who has always made a costume for Halloween since the dawn of time.
I am a guy who during my time in Santa Barbara had a total of 12 costumes for 4 Halloweens.
I am a guy who just repeated a costume for the first time ever.
NOW YOU CAN SEE WHY THIS IS A BIG DEAL
Let's begin. Last year was the first time for almost half a decade I was not going to experience an Isla Vista Halloween. I was used to having multiple costumes. In fact, I almost looked forward to it. There's something awesome about having multiple nights in the same setting but with completely different experiences. Cause that's what Halloween costumes give you: different experiences.
Up until last year my favorite costume and therefore favorite Halloween experience of all time was when I dressed up as Will Ferrell from the Saturday Night Live cowbell sketch.
Why was it my favorite? Because I got attention.
I love attention. I thrive off of attention. One might even go as far as to call me an attention whore (although that term is a bit brash). This is not a new thing. Just ask any one of my Facebook friends.
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My costume consisted of an afro, beard, drum stick, and cowbell. All of this was made clear by my SNL T-shirt tied up to my waste. Funny enough, my boxers rode high enough you couldn't even see my waste.
The whole night as we hopped from party to party I filled countless prescriptions for "more cowbell". Wherever I went I heard people impersonate Christopher Walken and shout "more cowbell!" and I would be happy to do my best impersonation of Will Ferrell's dance from the sketch. Even at a party someone switched on Blue Oyster Cult's famous song and, of course, I obliged.
Many times I tried to replicate how awesome that costume was, but I never truly succeeded.
Until last year that is.
ENTER: Wilfred.
Last summer I became obsessed with FX's show about a man who sees a dog as a human in a dog suit. It was exactly my style of comedy.
Not only that, but I was freshly in Los Angeles after graduating from UCSB and I had a job! Those factors together, along with some friendly guidance, steered me towards purchasing my first and most expensive costume to date: a giant grey dog suit.
For those of you that know me, I love to do accents. One of my better accents happens to be my Australian accent. Coupled with the fact that I love dry comedy and wit and I had the makings for something really special.
Last Halloween was celebrated from Thursday until Monday. Each day I would strip down to my gym shorts with pockets (very important to have pockets otherwise I wouldn't be able to hold anything), suit up in the Wilfred costume (which got very hot by the way), paint my nose black (every night I ended up losing that nose -- for various reasons), and start the Australian accent (which wouldn't end until the costume came off).
It only took one night to see how amazing this costume was.
The Thursday before Halloween, on a whim, I decided to go to Santa Barbara for my favorite night downtown. At this point I was working in Malibu so I was already half-way there. I donned on the Wilfred suit and character and immediately upon entering State st. the fun began.
"Wilfred? That's so amazing!!"
"Dude. Sick."
"We love you Wilfred!!"
"You're so soft. Can I hug you?"
Girls wanted to get near me and guys wanted to be my friend. I found that I could do whatever I wanted and nobody would stop me.
At the club Wildcat there was a long line. It was Halloween, this was expected.
Anybody else (including the friends I came with) would suck it up and wait it out. Not this dog.
After walking up and lifting my leg on the nearest fire hydrant, I headed towards the front of the line where I saw some friends I knew from school. Without hesitating I walked into line in front of them.
"Hey, what are you-"
The people - not my friends - started to say.
"Oh you're Wilfred? You can totally chill here!"
"I didn't ask for your permission" I said back in my Australian accent.
I could do as I pleased. I remember really testing my boundaries at the bar when I grabbed someone else's drink off the counter.
"Wilfred, go ahead and have it man!"
"Damn right." I'd say and walk away.
The next night I went bar hopping in LA. Upon entering the bar a girl walked up to me, stared at me, and dropped her number in my costume.
This was the norm for me now.
Every day last year I looked forward to what crazy adventures the next night would bring as I put on the suit, nose, and accent. And adventures they did bring. Too many adventures, in fact, to write about here.
Including this (if you can see it).
CUT TO:
This year's Halloween is approaching. I am still living in LA, I do NOT have a job, and I still have my Wilfred costume.
Was there really going to be any other outcome?
Like the show, I was renewed for a second season. Like the show, it was great -- but not as epic as the first. This was partly due to finances and partly due to the fact I had one and a half nights instead of five.
The costume, however, did not disappoint. It never really does. It's almost a drug to me now - a means for me to get the attention I always crave.
What's amazing about the costume is how strongly it breaks down the barriers normally prevalent in LA. People tend to be very closed off and stick to their groups in public settings. I would know, I often go to places where I only know one person among 20.
As Wilfred, though, it's a whole different ball game. There is no need for me to be worried about approaching new people. Everybody already loves me. I can say and do whatever I want and nobody will lift a finger. Not everyone has watched the show, but at the very worst, they simply think I'm a puppy. Nobody hates puppies.
Will I ever put on the costume again now that I've worn it for two years straight? No one knows. I do know, however, that it's the best money I've ever spent on anything Halloween related. So much so that it's hard for me to purchase anything else.
If this all sounds self-indulgent...just wait til you put the suit on for yourself.
Yes, by the way, this whole entry was a long advertisement for the Wilfred suit you can buy in the FX store. I'm getting paid on commission.
